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Lake Minnetonka Regional Park is the perfect place for families to enjoy a Saturday afternoon. Bring a picnic and enjoy a lakeside lunch. Learn more...

Noerenberg Gardens

Situated on the north shore of Lake Minnetonka’s majestic Crystal Bay, Noerenberg Memorial Gardens offers a tranquil retreat to the quiet elegance and grace of days gone by. A favorite subject for local artists and an idyllic location for weddings. Learn more...

 

Jokes Overheard at the Oxe Yoke Inn

A guy rushes into a bar, orders four expensive thirty year-old single malts and has the bartender line them up in front of him. Then, without pausing he downs each one.
"Phew," the bartender remarks, "you seem to be in a hurry."
"You would be, too, if you had what I have."
"What do you have," the bartender sympathetically asks.
"Fifty cents."


A young businessman had just started his own firm. He'd rented a beautiful office and had it furnished with antiques. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear busy, the businessman picked up the phone and started to pretend he had a big deal working. He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments. Finally he hung up and asked the visitor, "Can I help you?" The man said, "Sure. I've come to install the phone!"


There are two Swedish Pilots flying a plane into an airport. They line it up perfectly and all is looking good. "Looks like another perfect landing eh?" says one pilot to the other, "Yup" he answers with confidence. They glide in and hit the runway perfectly. However, as soon as they touch the ground they see the end quickly approaching. So, they slam on the brakes, put up the flaps and skid to a halt just before careening into a gully. "This has to be the shortest runway I have ever seen!" Says one pilot. The other one replies "ya...but it is perty darn wide."


Lifeguard: "I've been watching you, Mr. Jones, and you'll have to stop urinating in the pool."
Mr. Jones: "But everybody urinates in the pool."
Lifeguard: "Yes, but not from the diving board!"


Two snakes are sitting by the side of a road.
One says to the other, "Say, are we poisonous?"
"Yes," replies the second snake, "Why do you ask?"
The first snake answers, "Because I think I just bit my tongue!"

Get Busy!

The spring months bring countless opportunities for wholesome family activities. To find out about happenings in the Lake Minnetonka area, visit our complete Calendar of Events!

Lake Minnetonka: An area steeped in history

From the days when Dakota Indians inhabited her shores, leaving behind ancient burial mounds which are still visible today, to the era of the steam locomotive and the paddle wheeler when grand Victorian hotels and amusement parks stood proudly on her banks, there has always been something alluring about this enchanted body of water. Learn more...